The Cranky Media Guy

Well, 2008 wasn’t the most interesting year I’ve ever had, but it had its moments.  Here are the highlights:

*In March, I became Contributing Producer for the documentary The Passion of Andy Kaufman, about my late friend and performance artist/comedian/song and dance man.

*Also in March, I did 15 interviews (13 with American radio stations, 1 with a station in Australia and 1 with an Irish station) as “Robert Porter,” eccentric dot com millionaire who was offering Senator Hillary Clinton a million dollars to pose for “a series of tasteful nude photos.”  This was ostensibly to demonstrate that Mrs. Clinton really was a different kind of candidate, as she clamed to be, one who didn’t think that the human body was obscene.  The interviews were all done “straight” and the stations thought that Porter was sincere about “his” offer.  I also produced a series of videos for YouTube as Porter in which I challenged the Senator to take my offer.

*In June, I won Radio Shack’s National Invention Contest for my Homeland Security Helmet.  It’s a pith helmet which has a working video camera on it, along with a flashing blue light on top (to notify passers-by that they are being videotaped), two small lights to illuminate the scene being taped and a small sign featuring scrolling LED’s for urgent messages.  I’ll let you judge the sincerity and practicality of my invention.

*In July, again as “Bob Porter,” I was quoted in the Wall Street Journal as the proprietor of a company which arranges “staycations” (stay-at-home vacations for people who can’t afford a real vacation).  It should be noted that I do not operate such a company, I do not know anyone who has ever taken one nor have I ever taken one.  According to the WSJ, however, I’m an expert in the field.  I guess that means that I am.

*In September, a photo of me wearing my Homeland Security Helmet (the same photo which won me my Radio Shack Invention prize) was included in “Crust,” a science fiction novel by Lawrence Shainberg, published by Two Dollar Radio.  I appear on page 116 as Dr. Robert Fawck.

There was another noteworthy event in November but I can’t talk about it yet as it was part of another person’s project, details of which haven’t been revealed yet.  I’ll tell you all about it as soon as I can.

So, that was my year.  Like I said, not the biggest, nor the strangest, one I’ve ever had, but interesting nonetheless.

This time, we’re talking about health reporting. TV News Directors Association is proud as punch to partner with what amounts to an advertising firm to make fake news appear like magic on your television.

Schwitzer health news blog: TV news directors make another bad deal on health care news

“In celebration of Ivanhoe Broadcast News’ 30th anniversary, Ivanhoe and The Radio and Television News Directors Foundation have joined forces to provide two new training opportunities for journalists.”

What it all really means is that you are going to see more and more commercials disguised as news and more and more TV “journalists” acting as product pitch men. That’s just great. Like they didn’t lie to us enough as it was, now they are going to finish the job.

The only thing we can do is to REFUSE to watch any TV news, ever. Period. You’re reading this online so obviously you have Internet service. You can get real news online…although you have to hunt for it. I’ll suggest a few places some other time. Oh, and readers may feel free to suggest their own sources.

From Cartoon People

So you conspire to trash the US Constitution, you create a policy where torture isn’t torture unless YOU or the President say it is… some people don’t like that, and this makes YOU a victim of the War on Terror?

Wonkette : Alberto Gonzales, War On Terror’s Latest Victim

Mr. Gonzales said that “for some reason, I am portrayed as the one who is evil in formulating policies that people disagree with. I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror.”

Oh the humanity! Poor misunderstood Alberto. He only wanted to turn America into the Soviet Union. How could anyone call him evil? SNIVEL–WHINE. Why can’t people see what a good little crypto-Nazi he is?

He truly pities the fool.

It’s a basic principle of corporate greed that if you, the consumer, have one dime to spend freely, they are doing something wrong. Microsoft, a standard practitioner of corporatism, is dedicated to making sure you’ll be a little poorer in the future:
Microsoft outlines vision of pay-as-you-go computing.

“Microsoft notes in the application that the end user could end up paying more for the computer, compared with the one-off cost entailed in the existing PC business model, but argues the user would benefit by having a PC with an extended ‘useful life’.”

I understand they’re working on another plan to have everyone’s paycheck directly deposited to a corporate funding pool. There, the money will be distributed to the corporations to which you’ve been assigned as a “consumer”… and if there’s any left, they might pass it along to you after deducting a reasonable fee for their wonderful service.

I don’t know what it is about Republicans, but I think it has something to do with that party’s embrace of a very authoritarian and repressive version of Christianity. So like all those priests, I guess Republican politicians are driven to perversion by the mental handcuffs of their stated beliefs: Another Republican Politician Caught Trying To Screw Children

“Ortloff discussed engaging in various sexual acts with said ‘minors’ while conversing with them online and on the telephone,” states the plea agreement signed by Ortloff on Wednesday.

I remember a Republican party that used to be practical and interested in fiscal conservatism. Where did those Republicans go, hmm? It seems that the embrace of religious extremism has caused a death spiral for the party. Now the only thing they can do is attack, ridicule and slime the other guy.

On the positive side, it makes it much easier to find child molesters and other sex offenders: Just check the voting rolls.